


the type of friend i wish i always had

by wordbending



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Major Spoilers, Narrator Chara, Past Character Death, casual ableist language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-23
Updated: 2015-11-23
Packaged: 2018-05-03 02:31:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5273186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wordbending/pseuds/wordbending
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>* It’s Asriel.</p><p>* My best friend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	the type of friend i wish i always had

* It’s Asriel.

* My best friend.

* Asriel looks the same as he always did.

* …Which I suspect doesn’t mean much to you, does it?

* But Asriel… something's different about him. That expression he has kind of reminds me of our mom.

* Or like he’s trying to be like her, anyway.

* Asriel’s right. You should leave him alone.

* I… I don’t want to hear any more of this. Please, Frisk, let’s just go.

* Why won't you leave, Frisk? Is it just… sentimentality?

* Or are you just… curious? Do you just want to see what he’ll say? Do you want to see what I’ll say?

* You want to know why I climbed the mountain? You want to know why I hated humanity?

* I’d think you'd understand better than anyone.

* Or… maybe you aren’t the one asking.

* Well, either way, sometimes it’s better not to ask questions.

* …

* …

* …Ha. Ha ha ha.

* …

* hehehehehehe

* …

* … 

* hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

* What's with that look? Don't you get it? Isn't it obvious?!

* He doesn’t even realize I’m right here! Ha ha ha ha ha!

* Ha ha ha…

* Shut up. I’m not crying.

* I’m fine. See? Look at my face. I’m fine.

* Stop staring at me like that.

* Stop it! Leave me alone!

* …

* He’s right, you know. 

* I wasn’t a good friend.

* I wasn’t a good person. 

* Ha ha… everything that happened… it was all my fault.

* It wasn’t “our” plan. It was always my plan. I just… dragged him with me.

* I swallowed the flowers. I took my body through the barrier. I wanted to destroy the humans. And through it all… he tried to stop me.

* And I never listened.

* You know, I don’t think he realized the reason, but…

* When I was dying, I held on… stayed determined to live… for days. Just so I could see him a little longer.

* I didn’t want to let go.

* I was so selfish. I didn’t really think about him… or Mom, or Dad. Just me and what I wanted. All the way to the end.

* I told him my plan was to destroy the barrier and save the monsters…

* But was that really what I wanted to do? Or did I just want revenge?

* Even I don’t know. But I have a pretty good feeling.

* It doesn’t matter now. Even if my intentions had been noble, it would have ended up the same.

* The monsters would still have been trapped. 

* Asriel - my best friend - would still be... well. You know.

* Dad still would have… killed all those people. And Mom and Dad… they still would have separated. 

* I would be dead.

* Before I climbed the mountain, I did whatever it took to stay alive.

* I stole things. I hurt people. None of it mattered to me.

* But I didn’t know why. I didn’t know what I was staying alive for.

* Now I realize… I was just scared. I didn’t know what would happen if I died, but it was scarier to me than anything.

* …for a while, anyway. You know how that feels, don't you?

* But now, I realize, I made the wrong choice. I shouldn’t have been so selfish… I shouldn’t have clung to my life as long as I did.

* No. The truth is, I never should have been born at all.

* If I had known someone would find me when I climbed the mountain, I never would have done it.

* That way, Asriel could have found a different friend… the “friend he wished he always had.” And none of this would have happened.

“ …What? You don’t think that’s true?

* …

* Our locket? I… I don’t understand. What are you doing?

* …“Best Friends Forever,” huh?

* You are an idiot, aren’t you? You really think that matters now? 

* That was a long time ago. It’s like he said… you’re the kind of friend he really wanted. It should have been you from the start.

* …

* Frisk…

* You don’t have to lie to me.

* I told you… if I hadn’t been born…

* Then the barrier never would have been broken?

* The seven human souls never would have been collected?

* Without me and Asriel’s friendship… without our memories… me and you never would have been able to SAVE Asriel?

* …And you never would have made it this far?

* Ha ha ha… that’s not true.

* That’s… that’s… not… true…

* I’m… I’m just a… I’m not a good person, don’t you understand?!

* I didn’t do anything! It was all you, Frisk!

* Everything I did... after everything I've done... after everyone I've hurt… 

* Why are you… why are you so nice to me?

* …

* You’re… you don’t have to…

* …You’re so warm, Frisk.

* Even though I don’t really exist… even though I’m just a shadow… I can still feel it.

* The warmth of your SOUL.

* It’s… kind of nice.

* Ha ha… good thing I’m not real, huh?

* Your shirt would be all wet.

* …

* ...thank you, Frisk. You've been... a really good friend to me.

* But I can’t stay with you forever.

* When you leave the Underground… when you go to live on the surface… I won’t be able to remain with you.

* The golden flowers… didn’t you ever notice the seeds on your clothes?

* That’s me.

* All this time, that’s how I… how my spirit… has stayed with you.

* But… there’s too few of them now. And you’ll be too far away. Even at the barrier, I could feel myself slipping away… it took everything I had to stay with you then.

* I’m sorry.

* Looks like you'll have to lose someone else, huh?

* Don’t worry about me, Frisk. I’ll be OK.

* I’d rather stay with Asriel anyway. You should go live on the surface… go be happy.

* Besides…

* Someone has to take care of these flowers, right?

**Author's Note:**

> It's really clear to me that Chara is following Frisk around and acting as the narrator in the game... so I bet Asriel saying that Frisk was "the type of friend I wish I always had" hit them pretty hard.
> 
> Somebody really needs to hug these poor children


End file.
